Carrying My Cross
by Bonnie Wilhelm

Help me Lord to carry my cross,
I feel it's too heavy for me,
I'm overwhelmed and feeling lost
And it's bringing me to my knees.

All of my dreams have been shattered
Like a mirror on the floor,
All of my hope has been spattered
Like blood from an artery that tore.

I cannot continue to carry this weight,
I'm being crushed and beaten down,
My body rocks from the fear I can taste
And chaos in my mind that abounds.

Are you there Lord? Do you hear me?
Why can I no longer hear Your voice?
Am I so tired and too weary to see?
Did I not choose You when given a choice?

Now again I come to You in prayer
And I'm begging You on my knees,
But I'm not sure if You are there
Or if You're listening to my pleas.

I know You won't abandon me,
It states that in Your word,
So why is it I feel so very alone,
Like I'm not even being heard.

Let me feel some comfort Lord,
Allow me to have some peace,
Let Your healing oil be poured
And then please carry me.

Take this load from off my back
And set me gently down,
Show me what it is I lack,
Let me one day wear a crown.

Turn my burdens into blessings
And my troubles into rewards,
All my sins let me be confessing,
Heavenward let me face toward.

Carry me up this tiresome hill,
Let me rest beside a spring,
Holy Spirit, let my soul be filled
With Hallelujahs to the King.

I thought it was time to tell a story. It is a true story that took place several years ago. I truely believe I was blessed by God on this day and when I finish the story I believe you will think that as well. Please feel free to post your comments. I would love to hear from you. It's hard to have a discussion with myself.

We had several trees in our yard and we always had a lot of birds making nests in them. We had one tree though that we called the "death tree". Everytime a bird made a nest in that tree it died.
We never had any doves around our place till one spring when a lone dove showed up in our yard and to my horror built a nest in the "death tree". I was worried sick about the little bird and kept a watchful eye on it. One day I saw a baby dove on the ground under the tree. It had fallen out of the nest. I wanted so badly to help it, but I knew if I touched it I might as well kill it so I let it be.
I was used to robins who will feed their young and encourage them to fly when they are on the ground. I expected the same from the dove. Unfortunately, the mother dove watched her baby from a tree and never offered it any food or tried to get it to fly. I was heart sick. I kept thinking the bird will be all right. The mother will take care of it. For two days I fought the urge to pick the bird up and feed it as best as I could.
The third day I got up and went outside. My house, the trees, my son's swing set were all covered in doves. I don't know how many doves were there, but there had to be a good hundred or more. They were very silent and all were facing the little bird who lay so still on the ground. It was like a wake. Finally the little dove took his final breath. As he did all the doves flew up in the air and disappeared. I never had another dove after that. I buried the little dove apologizing that I had not done anything to help him. At the same time I knew that by not doing anything I was witness to an amazing act of nature by the doves. I actually witnessed a dove's funeral so to speak. I have never been witness to anything like that since. I feel God let me see something very special and I am honored to have seen it and have that memory.
Perhaps you have seen something very special and would like to share it. It would be a pleasure to read it. I look forward to reading your replies.